I tap my foot impatiently waiting for Alexander to arrive. We are spending a few days together in New York before heading to London. Well Alexander will mostly be working, a million TV shows and interviews and I’ll get to see the sights without him but we’ll be together every night and for me that makes me happy.
We’ve had 2 weeks apart, I spent some time at home with Mom while Alexander worked in LA starting off the publicity for his Zombie film. I missed him like crazy.
“Hey baby.” Alexander says.
“Hey you’re hear, finally. I missed you baby.” I says and I stand up and lift Alexander off the floor in a bear hug. “I love you so much baby.”
“Love you more.” Alexander says.
“No way baby. No way.” I whisper in Alexander’s ear.
“Is the driver here?” Alexander asks.
“I didn’t look, I was so grumpy at you being delayed.” I say
We look around and find the right sign. I grab Alexanders hand as we walk to the car, cheerful and light. I love being with my Alexander.
In the back of the car we sit as close as can be. I lean on Alexander and push my hand up his shirt to feel his stomach.
“Your skin is so soft baby.” I whisper and kiss his neck. “I love you so much.”
“I missed you so much. Can we stay in tonight? I know we’re going to be doing a lot of hotel eating this trip but I cannot face going out tonight.” Alexander pleads.
“Uh I’ve not seen you in two weeks. Sex, bubble bath and room service sounds perfect to me. My boy naked, yes please.” I leer at him. I just want to hold him all night without interruption.
“My boyfriend naked. Mmmmmmmm want.” Alexander replies.
“I know you do.” I murmurs running my hand over his crotch, he’s at full mast. Feels good.
“I’ve been hard since the minute I saw you.” Alexander murmurs back.
“I need you so bad.” I groan as the car pulls up at the hotel.
We tip the driver and head inside.
“Fuck this place is fancy.” I say.
“Yeah I want to fuck you in style.” Alexander grins.
“You got it.” I say.
The room is crazy beautiful with a great view of the park and I cannot believe we are here.
“I’m going to shower.” I say.
“No, kisses first.” Alexander says grabbing my hand and smoothing my face with his lips.
“You are the best kisser.” I say and kiss him right back. We fall onto the bed and keep kissing, biting and touching each other, our clothes are coming off. I roll away and just look at him. He gives me the biggest grin.
“You’re beautiful baby.” Alexander says.
“I’m getting fat, my mom was feeding me all damn day.” I say smirking.
“You once told me you’d still love me if I got fat. You are not fat but you’d still look really good with more weight. You are so fucking hot. I was so hot for you the first day we met. You were the hottest guy I’d ever seen. We shoulda just done it that day.” Alexander says.
“Nah, we had to get through what we got through. I was hot for you too. Especially when you told me you liked me. I thought you were the hottest, coolest guy I’d ever met and you liked me. But we’d have treated each other like crap.” I say.
“We did anyway. Well you did. We were such idiots. When did you know I was the guy for you, for real?” Alexander asks.
“You know that you’re always mine? That I will never be with anyone else?” I ask.
“I know. Me too. Stop avoiding the question.” Alexander laughs.
I feel amazing inside when he says that. So amazing I have to stop and catch my breath.
“When you called me to say we’d be roommates I felt pretty excited. I was scared you might beat the crap out of me but I was really impressed that you put your hate aside and called me. Then the night you invited yourself into my bed my crush resurfaced and I was in love with you when you turned me down a few weeks later. I was kind of embarrassed that I’d fallen for you, given you were in love with Jay. But it didn’t go away, I tried so hard to make it go away. It never did, it just got stronger every day. I knew you were the only man I was ever going to love when you dumped me. The pain was so intense.” I say knowing its true and not being afraid any more.
“I shoulda dumped you earlier.” Alexander says.
“You absolutely should. When did you know?” I ask.
“I loved messing around with you when we were first roommates but I was so concerned about you getting the wrong impression, that’s why I always slept in my own bed.” Alexander says.
“I hated you doing that.” I say.
“I know. After we got back from LA the first time I knew what a great guy you were and how easy you were to love. You showed me you were so much more, you were incredible. It was so hard holding back, I didn’t feel you deserved to have to deal with my shit. I know you would have and I loved you for that. Once I felt better I couldn’t hold back and it was the best time ever.” Alexander says.
“It really was, until this time round. This is the best.” I say.
“It is, feels so right.” Alexander says.
“So what made you change your mind about us?” I ask.
“Lots of things. Seeing you in class when I got back from filming my dick told me it wanted you, the minute I saw you. That was crazy, I’d been really happy with Jay we were really going somewhere I really felt that I was over you. But then I don’t know. I always thought Jay and I had that crazy chemistry, and we did but sitting next to you that day was like sitting on a live wire. I fought it so hard. I pushed and pushed the feelings away. I was so, so scared I wouldn’t survive breaking up with you again.” Alexander says.
“So you fucked everyone on spring break.” I joke.
“Like you kept it in your pants. Yeah I pushed you away and then when we got back I held back and I know that made you feel bad. You knew, knew I wasn’t being honest with you and given you were feeling so low anyway it was no big leap for you to believe I was cheating. I was so frustrated with myself. I was so mad that I’d held back and lost you and everyone else. When you told me you’d have kept me even if I had cheated I let go. I gave myself permission to fall for you again. I let myself love you and it felt so good. I could feel your love back much stronger than before. I let myself feel it all. I stopped putting up all the obstacles. I decided to hear you. I always complain about you not hearing me and I wasn’t listening to you. You were telling me you cared more about us than your sex life, your kinks. I didn’t want to believe I could be enough for you. From the minute we got together after I was sick I knew what we could be, it just took me a long time to accept it.” Alexander says.
“Oh baby, I would have waited forever.” I say.
“I believe you. I caught up again. I am never letting you go. I have lost way too many people already. Letting you back in to my life is the best decision I have ever made.” Alexander says.
I look at him and every pore is brimming with love. I am so lucky he forgave me for thinking the worst of him. He forgave me and he forgave Eric but he hasn’t spoken to any of our other friends since. I worry about him, I worry about being enough for him but I’m sure he’ll make new friends next semester.
I need him to know every day how much he means to me. We both need to be secure in this, to reassure each other every day.
“So, can I go shower now?” I ask.
“I suppose. Meany.” Alexander says and kisses me a whole lot more. We’re back making out heavily. I finally pull away and head to the bathroom leaving a fucking sexy man behind.
When I come back out Alexander has unpacked all our stuff and is watching a movie on his laptop.
“You look so sexy.” I say.
“I am sexy.” Alexander replies with a big grin.
“I’m crazy for you.” I say.
“Good.” Alexander says.
I lie down next to him and slip my arm round his waist. He catches me up on the movie and we watch together, a few light kisses and touches as we do. I love just being with him. When we were apart I missed doing our homework together just as much as I missed the sex and waking up with him. Now we’re back together these moments mean so much to me.
The movie ends and Alexander has been playing with my ass for the last ten minutes.
“You want me baby?” I ask.
“Oh yeah, you’re so mean making me wait.” Alexander says.
“But soooo much nicer for you.” I laugh.
“I don’t care about mess.” Alexander says.
“Horn dog. I’m worth waiting for.” I say.
“Oh I know. I am so lucky, now get here.” Alexander says pulling me to him.
He fucks me good, so, so, damn good. I roll on top of him afterwards, knowing how much he loves to feel my bodyweight on his.
“Fuck baby. You really know what I like.” Alexander says.
I roll off and face to face we kiss some more.
“You want more or room service?” I ask.
“I need food and you’ve worn me out. Round 2 tomorrow?” Alexander asks.
“Good for me. I have you every night for the next 2 months, I got time.” I say.
We browse the room service menu.
“$15 for cookies, fuck. We are not buying this shit. Let me go out and get something.” I say.
“I will spend a hundred dollars on cookies if it means you don’t get dressed again.” Alexander says.
“Baby we discussed a budget for this trip. I’m not poor but I’m not okay with throwing money away given I don’t have a job this summer. I already know you are spending way too much on this room.” I say.
“Come on we need this after being apart for 2 weeks. Stop being scrooge and let’s just order. I promise not to get the cookies.” Alexander says.
“Okay, okay but only tonight.” I say.
We grab the robes from the closet ready to cover up. Alexander pulls me back onto the bed and kisses me gently, playing with my hair.
“You’re so cute when you’re annoyed.” Alexander says.
“You’re sexy when you take charge.” I say.
“You mustn’t let me get my own way all summer.” Alexander says.
“I won’t. Promise. I’ll tell you when you’re being a brat.” I say,
“You better tell me off good.” Alexander says.
“Oh yeah? Your tastes changed?” I ask joking.
We wrestle on the bed until room service arrives when we rush to be vaguely presentable. We set up the table by the window and enjoy the view of the city at night and eat our food. I still feel happy when Alexander eats, it’s stupid he’s been mostly well for a long time, with just the minor blip the other week. I love taking care of him, making sure he’s well. He has changed me completely that way I was so selfish before him.
“Love you baby.” I say when we finish.
“I’m really lucky. I’m so glad we’re finally together. Bath time?” Alexander asks.
“Okay.” I say.
Alexander shoos me out the bathroom when I follow him in. So I enjoy the view some more and call my Mom quickly to let her know I got here okay and not to worry. We were supposed to take a trip together this summer, she was going to take time off to deal with her divorce from Dad but she got sucked back into work and I’m happy if she is but I do worry about her overdoing it with no one there to stop her.
I’m finally allowed in and Alexander has the bath ready the water is purple from something and there are loads of petals in the water and candles everywhere.
“Wow. You already had me, no need for the romance.” I say giggling.
“Cretin.” Alexander jokes.
“You still love me.” I say.
“I do.” Alexander sighs and climbs in, motioning me to sit between his legs which I do happily.
We relax and chat about what we’ll be doing for the next few days.
“When we hit London we can have all the champagne.” Alexander says.
“You and bubbles. Am I going to be dealing with drunk Alexander a lot?” I ask.
“Yup, loads. Nah I have so many early starts for TV and Radio shows. But on my days off, watch out.” Alexander says.
“Ahh I’ll be just as bad.” I say.
“I know, I can’t wait. We’ve not partied since we got back together. I can’t wait to drunk dance with you.” Alexander says.
“Sounds fun. Are we staying in London those days or do you want to go off elsewhere?” I ask.
“Honestly I don’t want to do the super speed see everywhere tourist thing. I’m happy to stay in one place and explore properly.” Alexander says.
“Yeah it’s not the only time we’ll travel together.” I say.
“Yeah, I love being able to talk about the future. I never thought we’d have one, even when things were at their best first time round. I never saw us lasting after college so I never thought that far ahead. Now I know we can do it and we can make plans, proper plans.” Alexander says.
I’m feeling pretty choked up, glad I’m facing away from him.
“I plan on staying in school a long time.” I say.
“I know. I hope to do 2 or 3 projects a year and live with you full time when I’m not working. Hopefully I can find projects close to where you’re studying and write when I’m not acting. I’m actually excited about the future again.” Alexander says.
“It’s been a quick turn around.” I say, still getting used to this confident, secure Alexander.
“I know. But not really I just wasn’t letting myself before, now I can. I think having that shot with Jay helped, I always saw us going back to each other and getting married and that stopped me from seeing a future with you. Once that was over for good it was easy to see you could be my future if I let myself be with you.” Alexander says.
“Once you went back to acting I thought I had no chance of a future with you. Hearing you not only say you want one but making plans means a whole lot to me. I don’t ever want to be without you.” I say.
“I still need some time out though. Proper time off from work and school to just be.” Alexander says.
“You’d be bored.” I say.
“I don’t think so, that summer dad and I had when I was fourteen we just did outdoors stuff, fishing and hiking and that was perfect for me. Of course we talked some but not heaps we didn’t need to.” Alexander says.
“Are you just wishing for that time again?” I ask.
“Maybe. I know he’s gone. I know I can’t have him back. But I would like more than a few days of peace.” Alexander says.
“Maybe we could travel after we graduate. Take a year off before you go back to acting properly and I do my masters.” I suggest.
“Maybe. Let’s just think of this trip for now.” Alexander says.
I do worry that Alexander might still take a year off from school or drop out. I can understand that maybe he doesn’t want to go back while he’s not talking to our friends.
The morning after the festival he refused to go back in the house to have brunch with the others. He said he didn’t want to see or speak to anyone of them. Eric came over in the afternoon and apologized again and Alexander accepted. Eric explained he was more hurt that Alexander hadn’t confided in him, he felt so stupid that he’d believed Barley when he’d had some doubts, and he should never have judged anyway given how he and Harry started.
The two of them are getting on okay now, that Alexander won’t talk to Harry makes it difficult though. Eric hasn’t said why Harry didn’t apologize too. Maybe he had other issues with Alexander, he hasn’t said anything to me.
Alexander is most hurt by Jamie. The two of them had stayed friends through everything. Jamie was the one to make the effort when Alexander was sick and before that after the Jay issue. I know Jamie tried with Alexander but Alexander refused to talk to him at all, same with Brian.
Alexander leans forward and kisses my neck and back snapping me back to the present.
“That feels good.” I murmur.
“Your skin is all soft and warm, very kissable.” Alexander says kissing me more.
I lean back and kiss him, His lips are so soft and his tongue so hot.
“Bed time.” I say standing up.
“Yeah my car comes at 4am tomorrow.” Alexander says.
“Oh boy.” I say.
I climb out the tub and hold my hand up to help him. We wrap up in the hotel towels.
“I feel like we’ll be removing these petals for days.” I say giggling and peeling some off of Alexander.
“More excuses to touch me.” Alexander says.
“Is that why you did it?” I giggle. Alexander melts me, he is the only guy I giggle around, I can be anything with him and he’s good with that. For him too. I know he is more playful and silly with me than anyone.
We lie on the beg facing each other just looking. Eye fucking.
“You have to go in 4 hours, you best sleep.” I say.
“I know. I just like what I see and don’t want to shut my eyes.” Alexander says.
“Why did I ever let you go? I am the stupidest fuck.” I say.
“Yup. We’re so lucky we came to our senses and neither of us met anyone meaningful.” Alexander says.
“I am so lucky that Casey was a fuck up.” I say.
“You are.” Alexander says.
I pull him close to me and kiss him one last time. He lies on me and snuggles close. I feel so proud to have him in my arms.