We spend the night making love to each other over and over. We wake late, sore, sticky and satisfied.


“Still love me?” Peter asks just as yesterday.


“Even more than yesterday.” I say knowing it is true. I can’t believe how quickly my life has changed.


“Still taking me back?” Peter asks.


“You know I’d never, ever push you away. I can’t live without you.” I say then mentally beat myself up for the poor turn of phrase after yesterday.


“Good.” Peter says with a grin, no offence taken. My man is not overly sensitive.


We run and swim and head to the clinic to get tested. We walk through the mall after holding hands and looking for clothes for Peter for his tour. We both struggle to get long enough jeans at times and are happiest in shorts most the time. The pants Peter wears for teaching are long past their best.


Once we find what we like we buy all we can and head to a coffee place.


“I love this, it’s Monday and it feels like I’m skipping school.” Peter says.


“I love seeing you so relaxed.” I say smiling at him, still can’t believe he’s all mine.


“Because when we tried to clothes shop together before it was so fraught?” Peter asks.


“No, I’d forgotten all about that. I stupidly had Jay on my mind and couldn’t see what an amazing guy you were. You took over the clothes shopping and I didn’t realise what a big job it was until I tried to do my own.” I admit.


“We had some good shopping days too. It wasn’t all bad was it?” Peter asks.


“No, almost all my memories of us are really good. I know we didn’t always treat each other well but I never carried any of that, especially as our last 2 years were so good. All our shit was pretty petty and easy to gloss over now. You did so much to take care of me and I’m never sure I truly appreciated it all at the time. I know I certainly didn’t do as much for you.” I say.


“You did loads for me. You forgave me for all my stupid shit and you looked after me too. Especially that final year when I had no real time for you. You never once complained and you always fitted in with me. We’re going to be great together again I know it. I want to take care of you and you want to take care of me. You have already made me feel so much more secure. I’m really lucky to have you.” Peter says.


“I feel lucky too. I do. I knew I missed you, I didn’t realize just how big that hole was.” I say.


“I know, everything I filled the space with feels so unimportant. All my ambition has fallen away, I’m suddenly completely satisfied with where I am.” Peter says.


“Wow that is true for me too. Another drink?” I ask.


Peter nods happily. I stand up and head back to the counter. I love how much Peter is changing, that I’m helping him so quickly. I look back at him, he’s starring at his phone and looking adorable. He’s mine. Butterflies swarm around my stomach. It’s so weird being so new and yet not at the same time. We need to treat it like it’s new we never got to enjoy that stage properly before.


I take the coffee back to him and he looks up, so effing beautiful.


“The kids are having a pizza party as we have no class on Wednesday. Is it okay if I go?” Peter asks.


“Of course. You don’t have to ask me. Can I come? I can get some merchandise sent down to give them.” I ask.


“Jorge will be there but I would love you to come and so would the kids.” Peter says.


“That is settled. We need to have lots of romantic dates. We never got to have the beginning getting to know you stage before. We still have lots to catch up on.” I say.


“Are you not worried about us being seen together too much?” Peter asks.


“Yes. I’d hate for you to be hounded. I’m sure we can walk round gardens and museums together without being seen.” I say.


“I’d rather be outdoors. Walking on the beach, swimming. We need a boat. We could sail together.” Peter says.


“Oh my gosh! Do you ever not have the best ideas? I’ll look into it, moorings and the like.” I say delighted at the thought.


“Baby you’re going a million miles a minute. We could maybe hire a boat for a day. We can’t be doing the getting to know you stage and making major purchases together.” Peter says bringing me back down to earth.


“I know I keep getting ahead of myself I look at you and my heart is all a flutter. It is new and exciting and I want you to be cherished and shown how amazing you are. But it is also not new, we know each other so well and I want to make proper long term plans. It’s hard for me to not get overexcited.” I say.


“I want the romance and security too baby, always.” Peter says.


“I don’t want any secrets.” I say.


“I’m telling you all I can. I’m letting you in.” Peter says.


“I know. Let’s go to my place. I might have some outfits for TV and events on the road. I get given a lot of stuff.” I say.


“You just want me stripping off again.” Peter laughs.


“Absolutely. Any excuse.” I laugh back as it is true.


We go through a few outfits and I love them all. I love seeing Peter in my things, I always have I don’t know why I like us to be the same. I guess it is my outward way of showing the world he’s mine.


We have a lovely couple of days getting to know each other properly again. We’ve got all the big stuff out in the open now and the rest is so easy. It is easy to be happy together. It feels too good to be true but it also feels so right and naturel. We are happy. Peter still asks for reassurance every morning and I hope he’s feeling properly loved, wanted and desired. I know that is important for him, he’s had so much success but his confidence has been completely drained, by me not fighting for him, by Gabe’s game playing and Jorge’s cheating and general dissatisfied nature. I know it will take a lot more time and effort to get him in shape. I have time.




“Do I look okay?” Alexander asks.


“The hottest man on the planet always looks amazing, so no you do not look okay you look phenomenal.” I answer.


“Thank-you babe but so I look appropriate?” Alexander asks hugging me tightly and kissing my cheek making me feel all warm inside.


“It’s a few high school kids and some pizza, you’ll be fine stop worrying.” I say.


“And Jorge. I’m totally terrified.” Alexander says.


“You don’t have to come. I want you with me but you can stay home.” I say.


“I want to come. I want to hear what these kids think of you as a teacher.” Alexander says.


We load up Alexander’s car with merchandise and books and drive over together happy. I am worried about seeing Jorge too but I can cope with Alexander beside me. He has changed my life so completely and I feel so lucky.


We arrive a little early and arrange with the manager to cover the bill before the kids and teachers start arriving. They are all a little in awe of Alexander and stay pretty quiet until one of the teachers breaks the ice asking Alexander some questions about a film he made. Soon all the kids are asking questions and enjoying the merchandise while they wait for food.


Jorge has a thunderous face on which makes me laugh inside. Soon the pizza arrives and I try to ignore Jorge and concentrate on everyone else.


“Mr Black we’re so excited you finally brought Sandy Green along. We couldn’t believe you’d been boyfriends when we looked you up after our first class.” One kid says.


“Mr Lleyva didn’t believe us until we showed him pictures.” A second kid says.


“Not the rude ones don’t worry.” The first kid says.


“Those were fake.” I say laughing.


So Jorge knew all along. It wasn’t a huge surprise that Alexander was Sandy, he knew before our first date. Why would he not have mentioned it? Why act all surprised when Alexander was at the dinner?


Alexander catches my eye and I can tell he shares the same confusion. Jorge is deep in conversation ignoring us.


“How did you guys meet?” Another of the kids asks.


“We were at college together. Alexander is incredibly smart, a brilliant mathematician. He recently moved up here to escape the Hollywood bubble and we ran into each other this weekend and for some reason he wanted to come and meet you lot.” I say laughing.


They bombard Alexander with more questions.


“Thanks for giving up your time to do the classes, they were really fun for the kids and helped with their confidence. They have a lot more ambition now too.” Mary one of the teachers says to me.


“Thanks I really enjoyed running them. I hope we can do the same next year.” I say.


“Do you think Sandy could sign and donate some things for fundraising? The kids are loving having him here, a total surprise.” Mary says.


“Of course he will. I’ll get him to send some things out. This type of event is about the level of fan contact he can cope with. He hates big events with loads of security.” I say.


“I was going to say I was sorry about you and Jorge, I was shocked you ended that so abruptly but I can see why, you are so much happier with Sandy. You two were made for each other.” Mary says.


“So you heard about me and Jorge. He likes to keep things so quiet. Still he cheated on me and Alexander happened to be there to pick me up.” I say.


“Well I never. With Bobbie I suppose. I’m so sorry, if I had known for sure I would have told you.” Mary says, that she assumes Bobbie shocks me and makes sense at the same time.


“Thanks that’s good to know. How are thing with you and Al?” I ask gesturing another teacher down the end of the table.


“Really good. I’ve these classes to thank. Funny the two romances coming out of this.” Mary says.


“I think a few amongst the kids too.” I say laughing.


“Oh yes, so much drama. But it’s lovely to see some of the shy kids in such demand.” Mary says.


The kids hand me a card they’ve all signed and I hand out copies of my book and they act enthused though I think they are far happier with Alexander’s film stuff. We settle up and head outside to wait with the kids who need lifts.


“Bit fast to be moving on.” Jorge whispers while standing next to me.


“You moved on months ago, why do you care?” I ask quietly.


“Bobbie warned me you’d never love me, that you only ever loved Alexander. He was right, I’m glad I protected myself. You’d have dropped me once he moved to town.” Jorge hisses.


“I loved you. I was crazy about you and did everything I could to make you happy but it was never enough. I was never good enough for you. So yes I’m moving on with someone who loves me but I would never have ended it with you for him.” I say, I look over at Alexander often he looks a bit worried but is giving us space.


“Yeah right like I could compete with him.” Jorge says.


“Then why agree to go out with me? You knew about my past with him before I even asked you out.” I ask.


“I don’t know. I was star struck, you were this famous hero who seemed genuinely interested in me. I didn’t expect it to last.” Jorge says.


“So you sabotaged us. Thanks.” I say, so annoyed that he strung me along so long.


“No. After that dinner when Bobbie warned me and he and Brandon wanted me I just took them up on the opportunity.” Jorge says.


“So it was Bobbie too. Shit. I never thought you would cheat, but to cheat with married and engaged guys is so low. You are scum.” I say.


“I’m sorry. If you had made me feel more secure and loved it wouldn’t have happened.” Jorge says.


“What else could I do? I begged you to move in. I made sure every date was something you wanted. I switched my schedule for you whenever I could. I told you who I felt. I never played games, I was up front about wanting to date you and about wanting more than casual. What else could I do?” I ask, upset that he’s confirmed I wasn’t a good enough boyfriend.


“You never told me about him, the money, the house. Not until it came out anyway. You never trusted me enough.” Jorge says.


“You told me you weren’t mad, you were supportive. I answered all your questions. It isn’t like you told me your financial situation with your exes either.” I say.


“Sharing the rent and a car payment is not the same thing as millions of dollars.” Jorge says.


“I didn’t think it mattered. I didn’t use his money other than take the rent from our house. My relationship with him was never about money. Fuck I paid for dinner far more often with Alexander than you ever did with me. You fully expected me to pay for everything. Was that the problem? That I didn’t spend millions on you?” I ask.


“No, you were generous and I liked that about you. I didn’t know you were keeping score.” Jorge says.


We’re interrupted by the last of the kids saying goodbye.


“Do you two need more time to talk?” Alexander asks.


“Were you planning your move while we were still together?” Jorge asks.


“No. I would never. I admit that Saturday I had an amazing time and I knew I wanted Peter back but I wouldn’t have done anything about it.” Alexander says.


Jorge nods sadly.


“I didn’t deserve what you did.” I say quietly.


“Looks like you did okay out of it.” Jorge says refusing to concede anything.


“Come on baby he’s not worth it. He’s a cold fucker who will never be happy.” Alexander says, taking my hand and pulling me towards the car.


“Thanks. He was fucking Bobbie too.” I say bewildered that I knew him so little.


“Are Bobbie and Harry that open?” Alexander asks.


“I didn’t think so. I don’t know. I should tell Harry.” I say.


“Maybe we should check with Felix.” Alexander says.


“No, if Bobbie was fucking Brandon too we need the facts before we tell Felix.” I say.


“Oh shit. Why did I move out here, I thought we left this sort of drama behind years ago.” Alexander says.


“Oh please you came here to win me back and cause drama of your own.” I say laughing.


We get out the car and kiss a little before walking to the door.
Harry is sat on the front step waiting for us looking like shit.





4 thoughts on “Pizza

  1. im beginning to think that peter doesnt even know what love is. he dumped alexander while ” in love”, dumped jorge while” in love”. peter is the common demoinator…he is the problem. such a crybaby, needing to get his way, all the tine


  2. ugh. why is peter carrying on and even talking to jorge? he said he wouldnt have left him for alexader had he not cheated, so superficial.

    im just not feeling it anyore


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