The engagement 15

Peter is being secretive about what he’s doing about the video. I know he’s working with Gavin on something and I’m letting him be but I’m worried, as I always am when he’s keeping something from me.

On Sunday we all gather for the screening.

“How was Eric?” I ask Brian.

“Not great, he is finding recovery difficult. With the show they are back on everyone’s radar and getting a lot of invites and not drinking and getting high is hard when back out with that crowd. And the offers that are coming through are more reality things, bad advertising deals and the like. Max is at least taking more acting classes and trying to find work.” Brian says.

“Max is committed to being sober, he asked whether Felix might be able to help if he did some anti drugs work in schools. He’s writing a piece to perform to kids about drugs and the downside to fame.” Jamie says.

“I might be able to help with that once my new job starts. If max is sober I’d be happy to have him run those sort of workshops. I’ll need a youth company and an outreach program.” Tom says.

“So you think they won’t make it as a couple?” I ask.

“No I don’t think so. Max is in a much better place, he really wants to act but accepts that his Hollywood career is over, or at least a long way from return. Eric is still after a quick fix.” Brian says.

“I can’t help him.” I say shaking my head.

We all sit together and begin to watch the show; we have the pilot and following episode to watch. I’m mentioned a few times, Eric has a big rant about me screwing him over in the divorce and his career. But in the second he is much nicer about me. Max is always respectful about everyone.

It does come out that he cheated on me for all of our marriage, including our wedding day. Which makes me feel sad that he made us go through it at all when he had no feelings for me at all.

The show is interesting and it will be a hit, they have enough set up situations to make it interesting and Eric and Max intriguing enough. Eric is difficult, his tantrums are shown but so is some of their therapy and we see a different side.

In the tease for the 3rd episode Eric is shown doing his apologies, including a phone call to me which has been faked.

“That didn’t happen.” Peter says as we switch it off.

“Not to Alexander, not to me. Eric is delusional.” Brian says.

“That’s only going to hurt his recovery.” Tom says.

“I hate seeing him that way.” Felix says quietly.

“He always was to an extent. He and Jay you never knew if you’d get the nice, friendly ambitious guy or the spiteful, jealous vindictive one.” Jamie says.

“True. He was awful to Peter when Alexander went away. Just about the worst he could be and I never got over that.” Felix says.

“Made us a whole lot closer and I’d not change that for the world.” Peter says.

“I know, I feel like everything good that has happened to us was because of what we went through then.” Felix says.

“I really miss Blondie. I wonder what he would have made of all this.” Peter says quietly.

“I dream of him sometimes.” Brian says.

“I miss him too.” I say sadly, the loss still hurts us all and puts everything in perspective.

“So what now?” Peter asks.

“I think we go and get wasted.” Tom says.

“We need to find a day club, get bottle service and behave like the young Hollywood that we are.” I say laughing.

“We’ve not been to a club since Eric used to dance.” Jamie says.

“You all up for it?” Tom asks.

“Totally.” Gavin says surprising me.

Tom makes some calls and cars arrive to whisk us away. Tom has one of his assistants meet us at the hotel with swim suits for all, we change and are sped off to the club. We have a large cabana with drinks waiting for us. It is crazy, we all claim to be too old but secretly love it. It’s crowded and the music is pumping and we love it. It is like being back in college. We enjoy the afternoon sun, we dance in the crowd and dip in the pool. Peter, Tom and I get asked for pictures loads and we are as gracious as we can be.

“We can do this on your beach when the house is done.” Tom says.

“Yes Sunday cookout and pool party.” I say with a smile knowing the life I want is so close.

“I can’t wait. Though no one can climb those steps too drunk.” Peter says.

“No we’ll have to stay up top round the pool if we’re drinking.” I say.

“Sounds more like a resort than a home.” Felix says.

“It will be. I love the space and can’t wait to visit.” Jamie says surprising me.

“I hope you’ll be our neighbors.” Peter says.

“Me too. We have friends back east, of course we do but none I would party in swim gear with.” Brian says.

“We really want to come out here. Especially now Felix is properly settled, you two are back together. Tom will be near by. We don’t need any more friends than that, we’d not cope.” Jamie says.

“Well you’re welcome to move into Alexander’s place with us once we buy it. While you look for somewhere.” Gavin says.

“Just try and stop us.” Brian says with a big grin.

“I can’t believe how much my social circle has grown in such a short time.” Gavin says with a smile.

“We love you, you make Felix very happy.” Brian says.

“It’s true. When is the wedding?” Jamie asks.

“Soon, we have to wait for these two to be done but it’ll be soon after.” Felix says surprising us all.

“Wow really?” I ask and they both nod shyly.

“Congratulations. Oh we could have a double wedding.” Peter says smiling.

“No thanks, we want to shout from the rooftops not keep it secret.” Felix says.

“How can you be sure so fast?” Tom asks.

“I’ve been ready to be married for a while and Gavin hates dating too. We both want the same things, we get on so well, he won’t put up with my bad behaviour and I won’t let him be a wall flower. We bring out the best in each other.” Felix says.

“And we’re madly in love.” Gavin says with a smile.

“And have been since we met.” Felix says.

“But how do you know it’s not just the early glossy lust?” Tom asks.

“Felix has everything I want in a husband. I am not the type of guy who gets bored of my boyfriends. If it’s not real deep lasting love yet, so what? It will be. We are so happy and comfortable together and have stacks of passion.” Gavin says.

I reach for Peter’s hand and squeeze it and he looks at me and I feel sheer elation.

“Exactly that, what those 2 have.” Felix says.

“We know its right.” Gavin says.

“I’m pleased for you and insanely jealous.” Tom says with a grin.

“You’ll find him. I propose a monthly dinner where each couple brings a date for Tom until he finds his man.” Peter says.

“I can find dates.” Tom says with a smile.

“But I can find husbands.” Peter counters.

“Yet you still haven’t found one for me.” Tom shakes his head.

“I will. I love you and don’t like it that you’re not as happy as can be.” Peter says and hugs his friend. We’re aware cameras are going off but don’t care.

I get stuck in conversation with Brian about what we can do about Eric if anything and Peter leaves my side. Later I see him deep in conversation with Gavin and I can’t quite shake my unease.

We leave for our hotel. We have a nice suite with a huge bed and a lovely terrace. We stay up late talking outside about the show and how to approach it tomorrow in our interview.

“We shouldn’t say anything negative about Eric.” I say.

“But we can’t lie, I want it known he has not apologised to you for what he did. I am happy to be the protective tiger.” Peter says.

“Anything we say is fuel for them to reply and include in the next series.” I counter.

“I don’t care. We have done nothing wrong. People are going to be talking about us, people are going to be thinking you are a fool for marrying him and I hate that.” Peter says stubbornly.

“How should I handle that part? Just say it was a mistake and I’m glad we’ve both moved on?” I ask.

“No. Be brutal. He cheated with Max on your wedding day. Say you were mad about him and heartbroken when he cheated, be the wounded party. Be honest, you did everything to make it work and he did nothing. So what that we got back together after and are happy.” Peter says.

“I could never do that.” I admit.

“Why not?” I ask.

“Because I never loved him. I knew what it was like to be in love and I wasn’t and married him anyway to stop being alone.” I admit.

“He knew that, even if you didn’t. Just because he’s a recovering addict doesn’t mean he isn’t smart or intuitive. He knew I was coming for you and he stopped it. I hate him for that. I really, really hate him and I don’t care who knows. Because of him I have been through hell.” Peter says.

“But your life is good now. Our life is good and his is not.” I say patiently knowing how protective Peter is feeling but I can’t be down on Eric.

“You’ll always win these conversations. I’ll never get to be myself ever again will I?” Peter asks.

“Not in public, no.” I say sadly.

“I wish we’d never agreed to this interview. If we’re not giving our side what is the point?” Peter asks.

“I’m sorry we can’t do what you want to. I just can’t heap any more grief on Eric, I can’t.” I say.

“Then I’ll always be seen as second best.” Peter says quietly.

“You still feel that way?” I ask feeling like a deflated balloon.

“Publically that is what I will always be. The rebound, the second husband, the chump.” Peter says.

“I hate that you feel anything like that. You know that. I can’t change my past. I’ll work out what to say so it’s clear you are a major upgrade and I’m lucky to have you.” I say.

“Promise me that you’ll always choose me. Over anyone else you always choose me.” Peter says looking at me as if he’s about to cry.

“Baby you know what you mean to me. You are my whole world, universe, I am nothing without you and I will never be anything without you. You always come first. You come before me, before anything and anyone. Always.” I say upset that I still have to tell him this but prepared to tell him a hundred more times because it is true.

Peter moves onto my lap straddling me and starts to kiss me hard. He feels so good and I let out a few soft moans. I love this, my loving Peter. He unzips me and pulls out my dick, slipping to the floor to take me in his mouth, it really doesn’t take much to get me ready.


Peter removes his pants and sits on me again, riding my face to face we kiss and hold each other close as he gentle bounces on me. I love him and can feel all his love for, me. Feels so good. So risky to be outdoors here in the city fucking but I wouldn’t stop him. He feels amazing. Always feels amazing. We’re so close, in our own world. We cum together easily kissing away our moans and slip quietly inside to bed.

I wake and Peter is on the phone talking animatedly. When he sees I’m awake he smiles and moves into the bathroom. I worry. I am desperate to ask what is going on but I know he will tell me when he’s ready.

We have a leisurely room service breakfast and laze about in bed until we need to get ready to go to the studio.

“You look so handsome.” I say to Peter as he comes out of makeup.

“You too. I like these suits.” Peter says.

“We look good. You ready?” I ask taking him in head to toe and feeling so proud he’s mine.

“Yeah.” Peter says giving me a fake smile and looking round worriedly.

The first part of the interview is general stuff, how we met, how we got back together. Questions about the wedding which we both lie about. We talk about future projects and films I have coming out soon. It’s friendly and non confrontational.

“Now rumors are circling about your ex husbands reality show. Have you seen it?” The interviewer asks.

“The first 2 episodes yes.” I say.

“You two are obviously very happy together but was it weird seeing him with someone else?” The interviewer asks.

“No, he and Max have been friends for a long time and had an on off relationship before Eric and I started dating.” I say.

“And their relationship just carried on for the whole of your marriage. When did you find out?” The interviewer asks.

“Not long after we got back from honeymoon. It was a real shock to find out they were together on our wedding day. I had no idea about that. But I’ve no hard feelings, I’m happy, I’m with Peter and that is the best outcome for me.” I say.

“I thought I’d lost him forever and now we’re getting married so I’m grateful to Max. I hate Eric for putting my fiancé through a divorce and not being his first husband will always be a heavy weight for me.” Peter says breaking my heart again seeing the sheer pain in his eyes.

“Speaking of heavy weights you have also been a victim of a recent blackmail plot. I hear the alleged perpetrators were apprehended this morning.” The interviewer says.

I have no idea what is going on.

“Yes, it’s been a really difficult situation, I’ve been working closely with the police, and a friend who is an expert in forensic computing and I believe the police made the move this morning.” Peter says.

“Must have been quite a shock that it was your old friend.” The interviewer says.

“I don’t have any further comment, not while charges haven’t been filed.” Peter says clear he’s shutting any further questions down and I turn white at the realization it is Jay.

The interview wraps up soon after, I barely say another word.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” I ask when we get backstage.

“I didn’t want you to warn him.” Peter says and I understand, though am very disappointed he didn’t trust me.

“Why didn’t you give me a chance to sort it amicably, why involve the police?” I ask.

“I knew it. You lied when you said I come first. You are far more worried about hurting Eric and Jay, and their reputations, how it reflects on you. I am always in last place, whatever you promise in private.” Peter says and I just don’t have an answer.
“You could have told me you knew who it was, that you were close to stopping them. I’ve been worried too. You didn’t need to do this alone.” I say.


“Yes I did. You wanted to blame Gavin and wouldn’t believe it could possibly be Jay, well it was. He was trying to extort money from me. He stole from you. Not just that one file, everything. He stole all your writing, all those emails I sent you on the island that you had saved, everything. He was going for you next. I had to stop him for both of us.” Peter says angry.


“It was my things he stole? While he was my agent?” I ask.


“Yes when you were on tour just like we thought.” Peter says.


“And you have made sure he has nothing now?” I ask.


“We think so, he hired someone to help but we think we tracked everything down.” Peter says.


“You and Gavin?” I ask.


“Yes.” Peter says.


“So it’s over? No more worry that anything comes out?” I ask.


“I think we’re safe now. They couldn’t sell anything. The magazines are too fearful.” Peter says.


“I’ll not put him in prison. If it comes to it I’ll tell the police he had legitimate access to my files.” I say.


“So you chose him over me.” Peter says nodding and walking away.


“Peter, no, stop. You know I will always choose you. I just don’t want to ruin his life.” I cry out.


“No, he gets away with it every time because he never gets held to account. He’ll come up with something else. He’ll put the word out about what he saw. People will try and catch me out, they’ll dig for stories and they’ll find them. They’ll find someone with a story to sell.” Peter says. I know he’s making sense but I just can’t sit by and see Jay’s life ruined. I am so torn. I know he can forgive me, he’s angry now but he will forgive me.


“He won’t baby, I’m going to talk to him and tell him that if he leaves you alone I’ll help him. Just let me make a deal, let me talk to him.” I say.


“You know my answer.” Peter says and walks away.



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