Ocean Blue 37

Blue, Bea and Chris talk all night. Any jealousy and animosity has fallen away. They share everything from their time apart and speculate over the now and the future.

“You could come to the lake, you know I understand why you didn’t, but now you have Larryand Gervais I don’t see why you couldn’t come and settle. Buy a farm.” Bea says

“I want Chris to go to vet school. He is so ready but there is nowhere near the lake he could do it. After he has qualified then sure we could.” Blue says.

“No we couldn’t. There is no life for you there. The community café won’t sustain you and it isn’t the right climate for wine.” Chris says.

“So I’ll grow apples and we make hard cider” Blue grins.

“And I’ll feed the by-products to the animals. Retired farm animals and rescues.” Chris says with a grin.

“Not much for Gervais though. I mean he can help run a kids program at the retreat but he needs something more to do than look after me.” Blue says

“I guess I can’t decide for Larry either. So weird that they sent you here and are keeping us away from our men.” Chris says

“Do you think something has happened to momma?” Blue asks

“I don’t think so. I would have heard before them.” Bea says

“Maybe dad has broken out of prison.” Chris laughs

“It has to be something of that level. I am worried about ocean, after that Adam kid targeted him.” Blue says quietly putting his biggest fear into words

“Blue no, why would they keep Larry and Gervais away if it’s that?” Chris says his mood dropping.

“No one would hurt that kid, his sunshine personality would stop everyone in their tracks.” Bea says.

“Other than momma no one but Ocean means so much to all three of us.” Blue says.

“Shit, that’s true.” Bea says and brushes away an angry tear.

“I’ll kill anyone who hurts him.” Chris says.

“And end up in jail with your mob family?” Blue asks frustrated and Chris snarls.

Ocean wakes while it is still dark, too cold to sleep more and decides to try and build a fire. He really hopes he doesn’t have another night out here. It has rained overnight and his blankets are wet. He finds enough dry material, moves to a small clearing and gets to work getting a spark. Feeling so glad he knows how.

He lies the blankets out to dry them and strips off his damp outer layer. He needs everything to dry out so his bag isn’t too heavy for the walk ahead. He is soon pink and as the sun begins He actually naps a little infront the flames and wakes up feeling pink and toasty as the sun begins to rise.

His things are dry enough so he packs up and gets walking again. Hoping today is the day he gets to safety. Sleeping outside with no tent is no fun in this weather.

Ocean walks and walks and walks. He s tops to eat and stretch, thankful he is in such good shape. He tapes up a blister on his little toe and hopes his old sneakers don’t develop any holes before he gets to safety.

Ocean thinks a lot as he walks. He thinks about Garrett and how well things have been going. Garrett is someone he can see himself with for a long time. He feels like he has again what he had with Jane before that went wrong. Of course Garrett has high ambitions and Ocean knows they will be tough to support.

This makes him think of Blue and Will and how they were before they lost each other. He’d give anything to see Blue walking towards him right now but at the same time hopes he hasn’t done anything stupid.

Ocean hopes this will be the end of everything that the mobsters making their move will expose them and Blue and Chris can be free. He needs them in his life. He knew he missed Blue but not just how much until they had the day fishing together. Blue as a shell of himself was still his calm wise friend and Ocean needs him back in his life full time.

Ocean understands how Blue lost himself, being alone like this is draining. He cannot imagine how Blue and Chris managed years and years of this. Never being able to pick up the phone and talk to anyone, friends or family must have been hell. Only ever having small talk, nothing more than the weather or how they take their coffee. Ocean’s heart breaks again for them.

He has to get back in one piece, he cannot put his friends and family through losing someone else. Spurred on Ocean ups his pace and strides on determined.

The night before Andy, Spence, Robin, will, Larry and Gervais stayed up late talking.

“How are things going with the kids?” Gervais asks.

“I’m not fighting for them.Aled has explained alot and I get why he did it. They were never my kids and I can’t put them through any pain. I will keep in contact and if want to see me, visit during school breaks or whatever then they can.” Will says they sadly.

“You need to show them you fought what if their grandparents die? You can’t put contact up to them.” Gervais says angrily.

“I can’t put them through a legal fight. Neither Aled or I can afford major legal bills, we’re working it out. Their grandparents are not old, they are loved and cared for. Aled is transitioning to a desk job and will be there for them a lot more.” Will says.

“How about you Robin?” Larry asks.

“Ella is still being obstructive so as you’ve seen Mike is bypassing her and while I’ll never be dad I will be in his life. Maybe down the road he’ll get to know. This way I think is safer from her poisoning him against me. Though if she and Mike divorce then it would change.” Robin says.

“I hope they do and soon, I can’t look at dad while he’s still with her.” Larry says.

“He has no idea that he almost lost you for good.” Gervais says.

“Actually he had suspicions. He came in as I was talking to you and Blue and I switched off but I was never sure that he didn’t see. He demanded to know what was going on and I kept the party line. He really had no idea that Ella was fooling him with the kid. He still loves her though. He will choose her over you.” Robin says bluntly.

“He already did. The second he let her touch my things, she burned my baby book and he married her. The emotion of this situation made me think I could forgive him and move on but I can’t. Spending time with Blue and Chris, seeing them get over all that has gone between them. I know I don’t have it in me to put in the work they have. I don’t have Blue’s capacity for forgiveness. Even he struggles and throws it all in Chris’s face at times. Dad has said sorry and done nothing to make thing up to me. Tad was always his favourite and it was okay because mom knew it and made me feel special. I’m still in last place, only there are 2 more kids and Ella ahead of me on the list now.” Larry says angrily.

“Blue is a dumb fuck for forgiving Chris. Mike is a good guy, someone worth forgiving. Chris is a shit and always will be.” Andy snorts.

“He has changed. I have changed. Do you think Blue is dumb for forgiving me and giving me another shot?” Gervais asks.

“In a way, yeah. You’re going to screw him over eventually. I love you together but you are a fuck up.” Andy shrugs.

“If anyone is a dumb fuck for forgiving someone it is me.” Spence says getting up and leaving.

“Babe come on.” Andy calls out running after his husband.

“What is going on with them?” Will asks.

“Andy has been a dick ever since Blue came back.” Gervais shrugs.

“Spence should drop him.” Robin says.

“Nah, they have a strong bond, strong love. Noting will split them apart, not now.” Will says.

“You and Blue ended.” Robin says.

“And I will always regret not waiting. With Aled and the kids gone I have nothing to stay here for.” Will says.

“I’m sorry we can’t both win.” Gervais says.

“You had faith in him, you waited. You deserve to win.” Will says sadly.

“He might yet wake up. We already broke up once.” Gervais says.

“Did you cheat?” Robin asks.

“No, fuck no, I would never. I went too fast and I didn’t treat him gently enough. He was always so strong, but you know how delicate he can get when he feels the world is against him.” Gervais says.

“I certainly do.” Robin grins.

“You better shape up. I am trusting you to be all he deserves. I will step in if you’re not up to it. I can treat him right and I would give anything for one more day with him.” Will says.

“What happened to standing back and letting us find our feet?” Gervais asks.

“You already fucked up. Birch says that Blue is a total mess and you are not helping.” Will says.

“Well Birch exposed him and let people know who Blue was being totally indiscreet.” Larry says.

“Fact is we might never see him again. If anything has happened to Ocean, if he isn’t okay then there is no way we will ever see Blue or Chris again.” Gervais says falling into sobs, the worry over Ocean and stress of being away from Blue is just too much.

“Come on, getting sick and stressing isn’t helping either of them. Lets get to bed.” Robin says gently. He has no idea if he should be on Gervais or Will’s side in this, all he knows is Blue should be the one to choose.

“I miss them. I even miss Chris.” Gervais says as he climbs into bed with Robin.

“They need you strong and together. Ocean is going to need a lot of protecting, a lot of love. You can’t go into hiding with Blue when Ocean gets back. You need to be there for him.” Robin says gently.

“Blue needs me more.” Gervais says.

“Blue needs someone. Ocean will need you.” Robin says.